I have always wished and prayed for a best friend, but I don't have one best friend like many people do. I have wished and prayed that I was a part of a group of friends who stayed in close contact over the years, but, again, that hasn't been the case either. I have struggled with both of these things and I know this has come to pass because in the past I haven't always been a good friend. To say that I regret this many times over is an understatement.
What I know though is that to have a good friends, I must be a good friend. So, I have spent the last several years focusing on friendship. Because I recognize that I haven't always been a good friend, it is very clear to me what I have needed to do be a good friend. Like anything else, I learn most from my mistakes.
What I have come to realize and accept is that friendship is fluid. Friendships wax and wain over time. The person you once bared your soul to you may no longer talk to on a regular basis. She may have moved on or be wrapped up in things going on in her life. You may realize that the interests you shared with that person are no longer as much of a priority as they once were. All of these things are okay. You may reconnect. You may not. Either way is fine and part of God's plan for both of you.
Friendship, like anything else requires time and commitment. It has taken several years for relationships to take root or be brought back to life, but beautiful things have happened. I still don't have a best friend and I still don't have a long term group of close friends, but those things don't matter in the same way they once did.
What I have now is great friends. Yes, all of these friends have another best friend and have circles of friends that I am not a part of, but that is okay. What matters is my friendship with that one person and what I can do to be a good friend to her. And for each friendship I have, I am so thankful.
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